Pastoring comes before friendships

We all like to be liked. 

In fact, we all need meaningful relationships. In Genesis 2:18, God acknowledged that mankind wasn't made to live alone. We NEED relationships.

But, you need to know that shepherding, at least temporarily,

can undermine relationships. As a pastor, you are not simply called to preach. Another vital part of your calling is to crave and work toward the spiritual health of your flock. When you see someone or something try to hurt someone in your congregation (physically, spiritually, emotionally, etc.), your shepherd's heart rate should rise and your feet be moved to action. You will step forward to protect your "sheep" from whatever form a wolf takes. If it's going to harm someone in your flock, it's going to have to get by you first.

I recently tweeted, "If a shepherd isn't bothered by what (or who) would bring harm to his sheep and doesn't chase off the threat, he isn't much of a shepherd." 

I don't need to tell you that when you step forward to ward off a "wolf," it may get you into trouble. Just a few of the reasons are:

• People don't want their wolf (sin) to be acknowledged ... especially by their pastor. They would be forced to acknowledge that they aren't as spiritually mature as they let on.
• People may like spending time with the wolf. They like their sin and believe you should mind your own business.
• Maybe the wolf is dressed up in sheep's clothing and is a member of your congregation. When confronted, they may move to protect themselves which means attacking you. Other people won't know where their anger is coming from or why they are doing what they're doing but you will ... and your love for them may mean that you keep quiet and take the hits.

On and on I could go. And I must acknowledge that I periodically have firsthand knowledge of this because I have my own struggles with sin that I am seeking to overcome in Christ's power. I have asked the deacons and staff (and others) at the church I shepherd to confront me if they see me hanging out with a wolf of sin.

But, even with our own personal shortcomings, we must move to protect those in our congregations from wolves. Your actions will seem to undermine the relationships you crave. Yet, as you throw your own safety to the wind in order that you may protect those in your flock, many in your congregation will come to see how much you love them.

So, I suppose the irony is that in putting pastoring above friendships, you may gain deeper relationships than you ever imagined possible.